Open Up & Welcome The Light
People don't get back -- > people I am surrounded by do not get back
People are not helpful -- > people I am surrounded by are not helpful
People are not supportive -- > people I am surrounded by are not supportive
People are not reliable -- > people I am surrounded by are not reliable
People do not care to understand me -- > people I am surrounded by don't care to understand me
People discriminate against me -- > people I am surrounded by discriminate against me
Don't globalize your local experiences. There is a better world out there. It is hard to imagine a world where you are supported and helped if you grew up in a backward area. I spent my high-school years in the most backward area in India, Bihar, and my college years in arguably the most backward area in the US, Mississippi. Across continents, my experience was the same. People in backwards areas tend to be collectivistic, conformist, and very brainwashed. Negativity and toxicity define their culture, which is partly why they continue to be impoverished. They tend to be know-it-alls, which means they are less likely than their prosperous peers to read, which makes brainwashing them even easier. Both Bihar and Mississippi have the lowest levels of educational attainment and the lowest literacy rates. People in these areas do not like ideas that contradict the status quo and are very prone to religion. They marginalize people who ask questions. Thus, insightful and intelligent people leave these areas like water evaporates out of mud. What's left behind is just dirt. No one moves to these places willingly. People only leave. Therefore, when you are in these areas, the experience is overwhelmingly negative. This does not mean, however, that you can't have a good life in these areas. Within these areas can be pockets of sub-realities, like a town that is remarkably different from the rest.
People who live in these areas are likely to become very negative about life. This is why my early writings were very pessimistic. I turned stoic by 16, I was taking cold showers on winter mornings before the internet. I could not envision a different reality. But there was and is a different reality. The world would fall apart if the entire world was like Bihar and Mississippi. Most of humanity has to be positive for the balance. More people have to be positive and cooperative than not for the world to function. Since it is functioning; maybe not Bihar and Mississippi, where everyone is poor, depressed, or both; I can make the point that the world is overall positive.
If you grew up in these areas, you probably won't receive well if I ask you to eliminate negative people from your life and give time only to positive and supportive people. You probably have never known the latter kind. Or you have known so few of them that you consider them exceptions rather than the norm. This is how twisted your reality has become. You think that being positive and cooperative is a special quality. Understand that you have seen the worst of it. Imagine living in the fattest state. You wouldn't know what normal humans look like. People who grew up in Mississippi all their lives probably can't envision a world where most people are slim and dashing.
In the end, I want you to know that our experience in this world depends entirely on our interactions with others. The physical infrastructure of your school, college, or workplace does not determine your experience. The material world is emotionally mostly neutral. A high-school classroom has no experiential meaning. If you had bad experiences there, then it would have a negative meaning to you and vice versa. Similarly, if you meet more positive people than you do negative ones, your experience would be positive and vice versa. If you don't know positive people, then at least keep a distance from negative ones. Your overall experience should be more positive than negative for you to feel positive and think positively. If you don't feel and think positively, you won't function at your best. Internalize these messages:
People do get back. You were just working with the wrong people.
People do want to see the best in you.
People are supportive and cooperative.
People are understanding.
People are reliable. You were communicating with the wrong people
People care about the truth.
Friendship works.
Love works.
Social media works. You were connected with the wrong people.
Everything works.
Life works.
You need more people supporting you than people actively working against you. For every enemy, find two friends. For everyone who is against you, find two who will stand behind you. Open up and allow your cheerleaders to help you. They are out there. And you don't quite have to find them. Just like your enemies naturally emerged when you told the truth, your friends will also naturally emerge when you go all out. Don't fall for Stoicism. Imagine the ideal world you want for yourself, and seek help until you get it. You will be surprised to find out how many strangers will help you. They are not strangers. They are friends you have not met.
Bonus:
Do people change?
Yes, they do. I have known at least two people who went from fake to real. People in backward areas have to be fake to fit in since they don't want to get ostracized. They might become real when they move out. Sometimes, they may become real when they become financially independent and don't need to please society anymore. Sometimes, they can become real when they understand that you won't betray them like their other friends did. I could tell that people in Mississippi could not believe that I was offering them legitimate friendship, not the kind people there offered them. I could tell that most of them were traumatized. People participating in these cultures are victims of the same toxicity and negativity. They are always in survival mode. We already know how people behave when they are in that state of mind. They also can't imagine a different world, so they act defensively.
