Originally published on Medium.com on Oct 26, 2019
Is it reasonable to chase money? To fight over property? To lust over fancy cars? To destroy nature? To hate anyone? To discriminate against anyone? To steal something?
Two days before you die, you do no focus on self-preservation anymore, nor do you think of belittling others. You do not worry about past mistakes. You do not worry about the future. Your head lightens up. You realize it is pointless to even think about yourself. You just want to enjoy your life, which requires giving up all the unnecessary thoughts that make your head heavy.
Two days before you die, you experience a kind of bliss you felt when you were a child. You did not know anything, and it did not matter. This is a state of not taking yourself too seriously. You now feel the laws of the universe because the clouds of your ego (your memories, knowledge, etc) begin to dissipate. You begin to see the truth because you are no longer imposing your observations/perceptions on it. You are no longer just an observer but also the observations and the observed. You again become a participant in this cosmic dance that you veered away from when your brain matured enough to play a game called the self or the ego.
Two days before you die, you feel a deep love for nature and everything natural, birds, insects, grass, and of course, people. You start to feel your deeper connection with the Universe. The Sun, the Moon, and other astronomical aspects feel more real. This is heavenly bliss, free of ego. You suddenly recall being born this way before your ego led you astray.
Perhaps, this deep love for all things in the Universe is the law of infinite love. By law, I mean something that stays true in all space and time coordinates, omnipresent, and ever-present. The focus on the self is why it became background noise.
My Christian friends struggled to love and forgive people. The church had told them to love but had failed to explain the nature of love, how it is done, if there is anything to be done. They struggled because they tried to love. The act of trying evokes a trier (which is the self/ego here). The pushing out, the self-regulation pollutes actions with the self, making it selfish, not selfless. The evocation of ego here is a denial of the higher law, which is love already. Behind the clouds of ego/self was love already.
I invoked death to stimulate thoughts on what is behind the ego. There are only two times humans are naturally ego-less — at birth and at death, when they do not know anything and when they give up everything they know. In between, they get blinded by ego. Truth becomes background noise but still remains true.