My revelations match some things said in Christian and Indian texts. Perhaps, I can explain what the authors might have meant.
To be submissive does not mean the woman must worship her husband, wash his feet in holy water. It does not mean slavery. It does not mean elevating him above herself. All it means is that she respects him and not treat him like he is less than she.
A close real-life example of such dynamic is the student-teacher one. As a student, a girl doesn't talk over her male teacher. She does not disrespect him. She speaks with composure and conducts herself with discipline and propriety. She is not sarcastic and does not try to make him look less than she. This dynamic allows her to rise above her toxicity and facilitates or eases a sense of romance. This is why it is common for female students to crush on male teachers. And this by no means is slavery. This dynamic does not make the teacher better than the student. Whenever a woman is placed in this dynamic, she would have an easy time falling in love and staying in it.
So long the girl is trying to put down the guy, she wouldn't be able to love him. People are not mean to those they dislike. They dislike people they were mean to. It's a kind of ego defense. Ever observed that girls end up hating girls they bully? It probably starts out as "fun" when they mean no real harm. It's more or less coping with their own insecurities. But soon, they begin to actively dislike their victims. Similarly, a girl who is sarcastic or rude to a boy will probably end up resenting him. It will never end in love. Contrarily, if she is respectful, nice, and not full of herself, she may fall for him. Not thinking that you are better than others is probably what being submissive means in this context; the girl is submitting or giving up her pride or arrogance instead of disrespecting the man.
Submission is probably the wrong word for this dynamic. Perhaps, it meant something else when ancient texts were written. Perhaps, people got the translation wrong. A better word can be nice or polite. Girls can just be nice and polite.